Can I see some ID?

Yes, ladies and gents, I recently got carded at Jack's Package - a lover-ly establishment with a delightful wine room, and my two favorite wines in stock.  The lady at the counter politely asked to see my ID; here's what happened:

Her: I need to see some ID.

Me: Oh, GOd bless you!! Thank you!!! 

I open wallet where said ID is visible through plastic window.

Her: Could you take that out, hon, cause I'm not believing what I'm seeing!!!

Me: Oh, how sweet!!! I could just kiss you!!!

She eyes me suspiciously as I remove DL from wallet and hand it to her. SHe stares at me... then at the DL, then at me - kinda like a tennis match on a teeny tiny court.

Me: I have four kids!

Her: Really.

Me: yeah. Oldest is 9 1/2, youngest just turned one on 1-3-09.  My boys are 7 1/2 and almost 5!

Her: Well, honey, I don't know what you do, but you do it well! You look to be in your mid-twenties!  What do you do?

Me: I love ya, lady! Can I bear a kid for you? BUy you a car? Lick your toilet clean?

I have decided to install that same lighting in the New House... who needs to see?